Somatic Aliveness

  Everyone's story matters, and sometimes our personal mythology needs help emerging from the basement of repression or forgetfulness. Those of us in the helping professions often assume that every word of a client's painful story is like a step on a long staircase that must be climbed for healing to occur. Words can illuminate, organize, and bear witness to experience, but they are not the only path to transformation. There is also a sensory field beyond words—a place where memory, emotion, imagery, movement, and felt experience come together. Within that field, another kind of knowing becomes possible, and our stories can be rediscovered, reshaped, and gently integrated. When I began my mental health counseling internship in 1990 at what was then known as The Gay and Lesbian Center in Hollywood, I had the honor of working with people whose life stories were shaped by homophobic and transphobic mistreatment, often beginning in childhood. As a young intern, I believed that ...

  As members of the LGBTQ+ community, we have the opportunity to cultivate relationships free from imposed religious, cultural, and social conditioning. Yet many of us continue to subscribe to colonized approaches to intimacy out of fear of judgment or a desire for acceptance. The garden of relationships is vast and diverse, offering many ways to love, connect, and build community. Whatever style of relationship you choose to cultivate is entirely up to you but let that choice be guided by what genuinely nourishes your life rather than by a desire for approval from the dominant culture. Many gay men living in LGBTQ+-friendly urban neighborhoods such as West Hollywood or Greenwich Village may have a network that includes platonic friends, friends with benefits, a life partner (who may or may not also be a sexual partner), work colleagues, and, in many cases, a broader community through 12-step programs, LGBTQ+-affirming churches, or other social groups. Each of these relationshi...